Second Date

Finally, here's the update from the second date...

As mentioned earlier, my wife had lined up a second date with the same guy. We had talked about what the second date might be like and agreed that kissing would be ok and really nothing else would happen. She arranged to meet him at a bar in the city (one we had been to before). She picked the place because it was familiar, although I had suggested another place that might be a little nicer and had a parking lot (good for her convenience and safety), turns out this small detail turned out to be important as the night unfolded.

She was getting ready in the bedroom and I waited in the living room, wondering what she would wear that night. When she came in, she had a tight, low cut t-shirt, above the knee skirt and the shoes I had bought her a few months ago. As soon as I saw the shoes, I got a funny fealing, I guess it was jealousy but since I rarely feel jealous, it was hard to pinpoint at the time. I got the feeling because I hadn't had a chance to see her wear them out on a date with me yet (in fact, just the previous weekend I had asked her to wear them to the movies, but she thought they were too dressy for that), and now her she was wearing them for him. She could tell I was a little uncomfortable so we talked about it, and after some back and forth decided she should wear them...I have to admit she did look GREAT in them :-)

We kissed and she left. She drove over to the city to meet him (she later that she felt great, sexy and young, excited for a few drinks with him while she drove). About 30min later she arrived and called me as we had planned, told me she saw him at the bar and would call me at 11pm, when we had decided would be a good time for her to leave (she didn't want to stay out late or drink too much since she gets some bad hangovers). I tried to pass the time but just like the first time, was kind of nervewracked, but not as much as the first time since we had been through the first date jitters and I was expecting a pretty early night. Fast forward to 10min to 11 and she calls me to tell me she's going to have another drink, will call me when she's ready to leave. It was really loud in the bar so we couldn't really talk, which made it hard for me to figure out when she would call back since we were deviating from "the plan" a bit. Before she hung up, I did manage to ask if there was any touching and she said no, not really, then she had to go.

The next hour was among the most stressful that I've had in awhile. I sat there waiting for her to call, trying to figure out when she would be leaving, what she was doing as I sat at the computer with my cell phone by the keyboard, waiting for it to ring. There were about 20 different times that I wanted to pick up the phone and call, but never did....I felt that calling her would either show a lack of trust (which I've never had an issue with with her), or interrupt a nice night out, or both. Finally at exactly midnight the phone rang and it was her, I could tell she was more than a little tipsy and there was a strange vibe from her voice, I asked where she was and she said she was on her way home. I asked how it went and she said "I gave him a blowjob"....my heart sunk, I felt bad and she could tell...we tried to talk about it on the phone but agreed it would be best if we waited until she got home.

In retrospect it's hard to explain exactly why, but it was a combination of feeling a little deceived (she had said nothing would happen that night) and like I missed out on something amazing (her first time with another guy). I also have a real temper sometimes and the fact that I had a few beers in me didn't help. I'll spare all the details, suffice to say that when she got home we talked, and argued, and had a really emotional night, barely slept a wink for either of us and had to deal with that the next day.

It was a rocky step, but we kept talking about it and everything is good now, great that we can have such open conversations about these things and understand what does and doesn't work for us. We also came the conclusion that we all (me, her and the other guy) all contributed to what happened that night, and there were some good lessons learned. In retrospect, we agreed that we went from 0 to 120 mph (no dates to dates by herself) and should think about slowing the ride down a little, but not stopping it :-)

We're still talking about our next steps, will keep the blog updated with news as it happens...

p.s. the story behind the blowjob is that during drinks her date asked her a few times if he could kiss her, she said "not in the bar". They chatted more and apparently after the quick talk she and I had at 10min to 11, where I asked if "anything was happening" she stepped things up a bit and started to rub her foot on his leg. He touched her leg under the table in return. After they finished their drinks, he walked her down the street towards her car, they stopped a few times to kiss on the street. After a few stops and several kisses, they found a little area off the street and went to a bench that was out of view. More kissing and one thing led to another, and she ended up sucking his cock right there on the bench. And yes, despite all the emotion of that night, I do find it to be a hot story now :-)